A Reason for Celebration

I've known for years that this day has to happen. I knew it was coming and I knew it was coming soon. There is no way around it. There is no pretending that it isn't here. There is no wishing it away. There is no amount of control that can make it be gone. While half of me is rejoicing, the other half of me is sad. I am forcing myself to focus on the joy instead of being overtaken with sadness.

Justin took his driving test today. He passed. He is now recognized as a legal driver in the State of Washington. He has purchased his first vehicle and he is gone. Not gone GONE, but gone. He is growing up and there is absolutely nothing I can do to stop it. He is exploring his freedom and he is loving it.

My heart breaks because he has wings and he knows how to use them. I know, I know, I know. I know this is what parents do. I know the day every child is born is one day closer to their release. I know parents raise their children to give them wings that allow them to fly. And this is what Tim and I have done. We have given Justin his wings and he is flying.

As his mom, I have several choices on how I can handle this life changing circumstance. I can be sad and dwell there. I can tell him "No, you can't go," knowing he'll go anyway, sooner or later. I can live in denial, but what will that gain me or him? Or I can celebrate.

I choose to celebrate. I choose to rejoice that Justin is growing up. I choose to rejoice that he has wings. I choose to not damage or break those wings. I choose to let go and rejoice, knowing that I serve a God who loves him so much more than I....a God that is his ultimate provider and protector.

Thank you Father God for Justin and for his life. I thank you and praise you for creating him, maturing him and protecting him. Thank you for giving him this step to becoming a man. Father, please guide and direct me, as his mom, in this process of letting go. It is happening and even though I rejoice and celebrate, it is a bit scary. But my trust remains in You.